Wednesday, 15 August 2018

When Your Spouse Keeps Admiring Other Women,Does It Matter Anything?


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You and your spouse.

But have you ever seen anyone,man or woman,child or adult who had never admired one person or the other in life? I am so sure that you have been caught many times saying ''I love the way this man behaves or I love the way the man dresses. Always looking cute.'' What is wrong with that? When  your spouse keeps admiring other women does it matter anything?





There are women when they are out with their spouses all they watch out for is to see or catch their husbands looking at other women. I now ask: What do they want to achieve from that? And when they succeed catching their husbands looking at other women,they begin to fabricate and make up negative stories from it. Yes,When your spouse keeps admiring other women,does it matter anything?

Let's take your own experience for example because everyone admires some people at some point in time. When you see a man and you say in your heart: '' Wow! I love the way this man looks'' what does it mean to you? A lot!

And I am also sure that if he extends his hand to you you would rise. If he opens his arms to you,you would also go for a hug even when your spouse is there.

There is something about admiration and it is so strong. Looking at a woman with admiration could either make you want to have her and if you are a super strong man who only admires the way she appears or dresses there would be no such feelings to have her. She is absolutely absent in your mind and heart!

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LOOK AND APPEARANCE.

You see there is a big difference between admiring the way someone looks and they way someone appears. When you admire the way someone looks,it means love at first sight. That is the kind of person you are attracted to. You can call him or her your very heart desire. Again the question: When your spouse keeps admiring other women,does it mean anything?  Most times yes!

If you already have a wife and in her presence you still admire another woman it means you have a wrong person by your side. Or did you marry her because of her character? Her background or her charisma? There you go! But what your heart desires,what you really want and need in a woman is not any of those things but her physique. You care so much about it!





You can't change certain physique such as tall to short and vise versa,so what happens when you get married to a short man or woman when all you have ever wanted is a tall person?

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU MISS YOUR HEART DESIRE

Most times,we don't get exactly what we want in life. and many times again,things don't go the way we plan! When you don't get  exactly what you desire in a marriage mate:


  • Bear it and enjoy the other advantages he or she has.



  • Understand this is life and there is no way you could have it all.



  • Even if you have a tall man or woman you love for a physique,her inner part may be so unbearable for you that sooner or later his or her tallness begins to mean nothing to you.



  • In marriage,what matters most is a partner who is and will be faithful,committed and supporting till the end and not the one who can add or contribute nothing in the relationship.Finally,



  • Whether it is beauty or glamour,some day it will fade and what remains is the inner stuff or beauty!!!



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Thursday, 9 August 2018

When You Are Not A Priority,Should You Stay Or Leave The Relationship?

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When You Are Not A Priority,Should You Stay Or Leave The Relationship?

Have you ever seen a relationship where either a man or a woman is not regarded or appreciated in their marriage? We are not talking about relationship where both parties are dating,still considering whether they could go down the aisle,no. We mean marriage. Marriage relationship! When you are not a priority should you stay or leave the relationship?





Well I have seen a lot of couples managing to stay in their marriages. A very close friend of mine for example had suffered lack of appreciation from her husband close to ten years in their marriage. She said,no matter what she did to please her husband,it seemed she was making him ignore her the more. She knew she was in marriage but she never felt she was loved by the man who was her husband. She was not a priority to him! As far as the man was concerned,she was a woman and wife who came to give him children. He wanted something else other than that very woman!

Fifteen years came and gone after she has had five kids for him,the situation was still the same. This woman never felt any special attention from her husband except that she got all the material things she needed to be comfortable.Soon she completely stopped giving specially attention to her husband and focusing on her kids who made her happy. And you know what? It was then that her husband began to feel that he was home alone. Then reverse became the case! When you are not a priority,should you stay or leave the relationship?

Another example of someone who was not a priority to her husband was a woman who endured loneliness in the presence of her husband for 12 years in her marriage. Her own story was so pathetic because she had no child in the marriage. Her husband who got married to her by himself suddenly changed his behave towards her and began to have what we call personality disorder. No touching,no fun play,no sex. They were just like classmates in a room having platonic relationship. But little did she know that the man she had married was a gay. He would always go out whenever he needed his fellow man and return after some days. His wife never knew that it was not a tight work schedule that had been keeping him away from touching her passionately but the gay spirit. When you are not a priority,should you stay or leave the relationship? 

Well in this case,the woman had to leave the relationship because she was not in marriage. She soon discovered she was married by this man to have a woman in his house to avoid the suspicion of being a gay. After all,gays don't marry or have wives.





What was the purpose of being in a marriage where you are no longer married? The man looks at you like you are still a baby,waiting for you to mature! His personality disorder makes him feel that if he touches your body or asks you to open your legs he would be eating a forbidden fruit. She had no children who would at least make her feel she was in marriage and the man was not ready to have anything to do with her. Yes,he was committing adultery of the highest order,abusing their marriage vows and relationship,neglecting and killing the his wife's emotional feelings and needs and you advised she should continue staying? May it never happen to you!

When you are not a priority,should you stay or leave the relationship? Your answer is as good as mine having considered the two examples above!!!



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Tuesday, 7 August 2018

How To Say No In Relationship When It Is Hard

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How To Say No In Relationship When It Is Hard

You know sometimes,many of us who have been in love do not know how it all started. We hardly also can remember how it began in the first place. This is because,to some people who are in relationship,it all started with ''love in at first sight'' whereas others gradually fell in love with someone they never ever got attracted to or even imagined they would ever swim in love with.





Now you deeply feel loved by the other person but your heart is sincerely with another,what would you do? He loves you so much and has done everything a man could possibly do to prove his love to his girlfriend but you still do not feel same with him. Your heart goes to someone somewhere out there your heart imagined to be with and yearn for but you do not know how to say no to this wonderful boyfriend of yours.

Surely,if there is anything you need to do now to set your heart free from the relationship your heart is so absent minded,it is to say NO. But how could you do this? 


HOW TO SAY NO IN RELATIONSHIP WHEN IT IS HARD 

It has been proven that before a girl finds the one she truly loves and yearn for,she would have met all sorts of men on the way ,coming to her. Those who enter into troubles to the extent they cannot say no when it is the only thing they've got to say are those who say yes to Jark and Jin on their way.

How could Mr A come to you and knowing that you don't want the kind of Mr A is as a lover and you still accepted just because he can make you happy? Then you forgot that relationship is not all about the happiness you receive but the happiness you also give in turn.





Now you are in trouble,how would you come out of it? That is the question. How to say no in relationship when it is hard.

One of the ways you can say know to your boyfriend when you are no longer interested in a relationship to by slowly withdrawing. Start doing less those things you do that make him feel you are closely with him. Then he will come to you and ask you what is happening. Even at this time you have the opportunity to tell him you are not interested,do not say it so loud and clear. Simply tell him you don't understand what you feel about the relationship any more.That you are not enjoying it as before. And if he asks you if you are seeing another man tell him no. He deserves enough respect from you. A man who loves you and get no for an answer from you should not be hurt or stricken in the neck.

Secondly at this point,you say the 'no' but without apology. Often we believe that it is polite to say ''I am sorry'' when we are not agreeing with someone but  this ''I am sorry'' thing does not matter anything to him or her at this point.

Please read: Simple Ways to Stop Messing Up Your Relationships

But wait a moment. What are you saying sorry for? Is it a crime to say no to something that doesn't give you joy or to something that you don't like or want in your life? Simply thank him and tell him you are grateful that he loves you but you can't force yourself to go against your immediate will.

Then the third point on how to say no in relationship when it is hard is this: ''Do not tell him any negative thing you feel about him or you hate about him such as ''I need a better man,a man who can take care of my financial or material needs.'' ''I need a man who is educated and not an illiterate like you''. Please avoid these insults and do not tell a man that loves you he is not man enough!

However,if the problem is based on anything humanly impossible to change,it is positive you tell him your reason for wanting to say no. For example,you could tell him that your gynotype or blood group is no match with his. Ask him what his blood group is and wisely tell him yours that will not match with it.

A friend of mine who wanted to get out of a relationship that seemed to kept her in bondage forged an idea. She told her ever loyal boyfriend who wouldn't give her a breathing space that her late mother died of diabetes the same thing that killed his own father. And she made him to see that since this medical issue is in their families,the best thing to do is to quit the relationship and avert breakdown on the way.

Our point is that it is not a crime to say no to anything you do not want but you must do so with respect and love. A man who loves you and shows you love has done nothing bad. Where many do not see you in favor,he picks you and makes you his suitor. This man deserves respect and not insult or embarrassment. Yes,you owe no one apology for going for what you want!!!
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Is It Normal To Experience Changes In Relationship?

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What do we mean by this: ''Is it normal to experience changes in relationship?'' It means for a relationship to have good,bad and ugly faces. Today you may feel you are enjoying the best relationship on earth and tomorrow it changes and you begin to wonder if it is still the love you were talking about few days ago with your friends. Is this normal? Is it normal to experience changes in relationship?

Yes it is very very normal! In life,it is very normal for anything worth doing or living for to experience changes. Our life change,our thoughts and emotion change,our habit changes,and our works also change. What is it on earth and about life that does not experience change or changes? Change is a sign of progression if you ask me.

Is It Normal To Experience Change In Relationship?


I am yet to see any relationship on earth that never experienced ups and downs before it is made perfect in love. Could you think of any? Have you seen in your entire life? If all you experience in your relationship is sweetness all the time then my dear you are not in a relationship. You ain't enjoying anything! Has he no gall even if you pretend you have none? What human of your nature on having gall to keep living pretend you are an angel without the need of it? Even angels from heaven get angry and strike to express their displeasure. How much more humans!





We are not talking about being beaten up by your boyfriend to know you are in a real relationship,no. If your boyfriend beats you up whenever he is irritated or disappointed by you he has a very big attitude problem. If it becomes a habit he can't fight to change,hello girl,you had better find your way out of his life. This is not the kind of change we are talking about here. We mean such changes as love turning cold from warm,uncertainty highing and things not working as expected. Is it normal to experience changes in relationship? Again yes.

In case your erred partner comes back in love with you please read this: 5 Ways To Forgive Your Partner When It's So Difficult To Do So


Here is how to deal with changes in your relationship

First understand that it is normal for partners in relationships to have some attitude changes after all,how could you tell if he or she is thinking whether his or her partner in a relationship is the right person for him or her? Change is a sign of progression remember.  If your partner is changing in the way he or she behaves,it means he or she is in the process of thinking of possibilities. You both should respect changes and allow your partner to make his or her decision. This is why relationship is for mature minds!





Secondly,why changes are taking place,do not shut the door of communication. Leave it open. Relationship is like school where you study the course of your choice. Your partner is your course choice. You need to attend classes to pass your course. Open the door of communication in your relationship even though it is difficult to understand at the moment. But you know what? As soon as both of you begin to have understanding of each other you will begin to enjoy everything about it.

Finally, to dear Motivational friends,listen to your inner voice speaking to you.Changes in a relationship is opportunity for you to see all you need to know about the person you are thinking of building your future and spending the rest of your life with. You see it is not any bad at all to see or experience changes in your relationship. Do not ignore the inner voice that speaks to you at the time of changes. Don't force love when the other says it is over with you. Just understand he or she can not go far with you in future being the reason he or she has chosen to quit. What do you have against that? You should rather be happy that what will be a hindrance for you later in life is already leaving. Cheers!!!


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Monday, 6 August 2018

5 Ways To Forgive Your Partner When It's So Difficult To Do So

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5 Ways To Forgive Your Partner When It's So Difficult To Do So

And now I am sure those who are still on their way to marriage are thinking if this is actually for them. We are talking about partners,and yes,anyone in a relationship has a partner. But the partners in our interest here are those who are married. 5 ways to forgive your partner when it's so difficult to do so.






You know,when one is in a relationship at friendship level or stage,it is very easy to choose what to do with one's partner. If he for example has unbearable attitude and you see he is not ready to change,the best thing to do is to quit the relationship for good. But however,the case is not the same when one is already married. There is no going out easily for any course. One just has to bear it all with forgiving attitude.

Forgiveness.

Forgiveness if you ask me is not easy to grant especially when someone you truly love and cherish is the one that has greatly hurt you. Your heart was broken,the trust has been betrayed. But what would you do when it is coming from your life mate? You can't always run away and you can't live in silence with him. No you can't!





Here Are 5 Ways To Forgive Your Partner When It's So Difficult To Do So


  • One of the 5 ways to forgive your partner when it is so difficult to do is to understand that everyone has crazy attitude. Yes,there is a crazy attitude in me,there is a crazy attitude in you and there is a crazy attitude in everyone out there! Didn't you see that crazy attitude in your partner when you guys were dating? Oh maybe,you were blinded by love! But he was showing it,but you were not seeing it. Unfortunately,this crazy attitude of your partner may not be changed for life. It could only be managed. To make it easy to forgive your partner when it's difficult to do so,always remember you have yours too he has to deal with.



  • The second way to forgive your partner when it's so difficult to do so is to remember the fact that you both came from different background. The way one lives his life is dependent on one's background. The training he received and how he thinks is the best way to live. Again you can't change it. The only thing you have to do is to respect it and either choose to follow along or ignore it. Maybe,if he sees that your own way of life is more reasonable he could change his and join you.



  • Did your partner cheat on you with another man or woman? Then realize there is fault somewhere which you have not fixed to have prevented cheating in the first place. The truth is that no partner will purposely or willingly cheat on his or her love mate for no reason. Maybe you nag a lot and hardly give him space to relax whenever he comes home. Men hate nagging wives and men love playful mates like children. Did your wife cheat on you with another man? Somehow you must have contributed to it. Maybe you have not satisfied her emotionally,romantically,or materially. It is very true that no one has right to cheat on his or her partner because of certain reasons,but please,do not give chance to devil to penetrate.If your partner has cheated on you,do remember you have somehow contributed to his or or action and please forgive. 



  • The fourth of 5 ways to forgive your partner when it's so difficult to do so is to remember there is no man who does not sin. This is the reason why love the greatest book of wisdom says covers a multitude of sin. Who are you leaving your husband or wife for when everyone has his own fault? Work hard in the life of your partner to see that you both are two in one.When you and your partner are one,you won't be seeing things differently but in the same angle.  Then,what he likes you would like,and he wouldn't have any reason to hurt you beyond what you can bear.



  • The fifth of 5 ways to forgive your partner when it's so difficult to do so is to always remember that you are already in marriage. Your marriage vow says it is for better and for worse until death do you apart! Whenever your partner wrongs or hurts you knowing that there is no other place to run away to would make you to forgive him or her and continue living together. Your husband or wife is your partner for life. See him or her as the cloth that covers your skin from shamefulness and you would never have any reason not to wash it clean when it is stained!


Marriage is not easy no matter the promises that comes with it. Let no one deceive you with sweet coated tongue that it is heaven on earth! No you have to make your marriage a heaven on earth through hard work and cooperation with your partner. But unfortunately,a lot of marriage mates have messed up this beautiful institution called marriage. To avoid yours from being messed up,please read this article: Simple Ways to Stop Messing Up Your RelationshipsAnd if you are fortunate,he or she will be willing to cooperate with you because,not everyone can cooperate with his mate. If you are fortunate and have a partner who cooperates,yes,your marriage can be a heaven on earth!!!






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Friday, 3 August 2018

10 Jealousy Quotes For Married And Single

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10 Jealousy Quotes For Married And Single!

Looking for the best jealousy quotes for married and singles?

Because we live in a world where NO ONE can get everything that he or she ever wants,because we live in a world where things don't always work the way we want,we see people all around us being happy when we are not.

We see people,friends and even family members succeeding where we have failed.

This could result to jealousy. Here is brought to you 10 jealousy quotes for married and single! Enjoy it!!

10 Jealousy Quotes For Married And Single!

Jealous quote 1 : ''There is nothing best anyone can get in life.'' Therefore,even if it seems you will end up not getting married in this life,bear it. Those who have and who will are not filled with all joy either.

Jealous quote 2: ''What gives joy is what one gives and not what one receives.'' Therefore,aim to be productive if happiness is what you seek.

Jealous quote 3: ''Life does not depend on what one has but on the creator who gives it.'' Therefore,rather than cry your heart out and feel less of yourself because you have no child,husband or wife live your live morally and spiritually clean to keep fit while the days count.

Jealous quote 4: ''Quality does not live on a platter of gold. It is refined in fire.'' Therefore,difficulties in marriage strengthens marriage. Do not run away from it when it comes!''

Jealous quote 5 : ''The wise share their problems and the fools bury theirs.'' What is so good about problems that one should horde it for himself? Food for thought!!

Jealous quote 6: ''Problems are  like wounds that deteriorate when left untreated.'' This is for those who like saving issues for another day. For goodness sake,how could a man be having issues with his lady and he pretends that every thing is under control? 

Jealous quote 7: ''Imagination is the poison which only antidote is reality.''  This explains the reason why imagination most times is waist of time and energy.  Sometimes,what we imagine about our partners,what we imagine they are doing at some points end up being something else in reality.

Jealous quote 8 : ''There is more fine gains in following the heart than the crowd.''- This is for those who are still searching and patiently waiting for the arrival of their suitors. No matter what,do not allow the fear and pressure of family or tradition push you to marry whoever you do not desire to marry. Refuse to be pushed into a pit. Avoid the consequences of marrying the wrong person!!

 Jealous quote 9 :''No sayings of a man should matter anything to you except that from your heart.''- monikmotivational.com

The conclusion of everything is we all are in journey of sojourn. Do not be deceived by anyone who claims his journey is painless because we all walk on the same road to our different destinations. Everyone has their own peculiar problems. When you see yours learn to face it.

Read more than 10 jealous quotes for married and single under: 22 Beautiful Wedding Quotes for 2018

Finally,do not allow any man to be a dictator of your own life. Be in charge of your life,control it and tell yourself how you want it to be!!!



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Saturday, 28 July 2018

Simple Ways to Stop Messing Up Your Relationships

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Why You May Be Messed Up In Your Relationship!

Do you know you may be the one messing up your relationship?

Come to think of it!

Have you discovered that virtually every girl child is in a relationship these days except the toddlers?

The moment girls begin to shoot out breasts on their chests,they think they are ripped for relationship. They quickly forget that puberty age is the process and getting ready to maturity as they learn from their biology studies and begin to force out feelings for romance.

Yes,this is why you may be messed up in your relationship!


Recently,we have learnt that girls are the ones going after boys for relationships. Boys know they are still growing and they are not yet ready for anything called relationships.

They only get to know romance through pictures and films but have not really developed real feelings for it. Yes,we now see girls doing the romance on the boys,forcing the feelings out of the innocent boys. Girls why?

Naturally,when things are not allowed to come their own way,nature has its way of sending it out completely.

A man never said he wants you and you have already given him your entire body. You have succeeded in making him lose his senses and have you but don't worry his eyes will soon open and he will know good and bad.

If he doesn't respect you,if he has no atom of love for you he will surely hurt you. You see why you may be messed up in your relationship?

The problem is not being in a relationship. It is being in a relationship because you see your friends are already there and you feel you are left out.

You also want to be reckoned with ''Oh she has a boyfriend.'' What's that? What is the price in having a boyfriend? Any gold medal from it? Hello?

Please read this: Is Marriage Really An Achievement?



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Forcing yourself to be in a relationship with someone who has not asked for it is like forcing someone to study a course he never likes or thinks about. If the course does not mess him up,he  will mess up the course itself.

Love and understanding make relationships work. Yes love. If he does not love you as much as you do,it will only take you and you alone to make the relationship work until you are tired of it. No gift,no love,no appreciation for having you!


What a total mess of relationship! Your action is one reason why you may be messed up in your relationship!

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What relationship is there when a lady would be asked ''Do you have a boyfriend'' and she would say yes,but when you ask her so called boyfriend the same question,he would say no? His more response would be ''When I have a girlfriend the whole world would know.''

You see now?

When men go for what they want,they go crazy about it. They don't hide their feelings and they make sure that their girls are happy and full of life. Yes,that is what makes relationship work.

Two hearts must beat as one as it takes two to tangle!! Anything outside this is a mess of relationship. Most times,ladies are the ones that ask to be messed up by men .


They think their boo and ass are what get men tied and hooked up. But not for long.

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Dear growing girls and ladies,keep calm and do not force relationship to be! Allow the man show interest and give you signal.

Yes,allow him take the lead and then follow up.

Remember,taking relationship to the next level lies not in your court but in his!

If you initiate a man who is not willing to have you in a relationship,he will mess you up. If you think your boo or ass can get him down,one day he will rise and tell you he is a man.


You now see why you may be messed up in your relationship? Use your senses!!!
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Thursday, 26 July 2018

Is Marriage Really An Achievement


Is Marriage Really An Achievement?

Okay,so we have really heard a lot of ladies talk so much about marriage,making it look like marriage is not an accomplishment.

Some said they have been there and didn't see anything so great about it to make marriage achievement. They argue that if one could make oneself happy it is a great achievement. Then I ask: What makes one really happy?

Well to some,it is marriage! And to others,it is their career,profession,hobbies and wealth.Is marriage really an achievement?

Is it correct to say that what makes one happy is an achievement? Certainly! So what happens when ones' happiness is in marriage? Okay,let's take it this way:

Let's say that one's happiness lies in his career. No matter whatever you do,he is never happy until he sees himself in the line of his career. Yes,he is there but hasn't made waves. He is still struggling,jumping one huddle after another,trying to find his feet in his career. Would you say that this man is fulfilled? Not yet. And I am not sure he will ever count it as an achievement if he does not succeed in his career.

Our point: No course is an achievement until one makes success in it! Is marriage really an achievement we ask?

The answer to if marriage is an achievement can be deduced from the above example of a man whose happiness lies in his career. If a woman's happiness lies in marriage and she eventually marries and instead of being so happy and feeling fulfilled in it,she is asking herself ''what even brought me to the marriage in the first place?'' Then my dear,you do not need anyone to tell you that marriage is not an achievement if that is how it feels.

Is marriage really an achievement? Fine,let's take it in another direction. Surely there are marriages that have brought huge blessings to people. A woman on a good day is happy and after getting married she is happier. This is an achievement for her and no regret.

Read also: Is It Okay To Marry Someone Younger Than I am?

A man who was not buoyant before he got married found a gainful employment and contract here and there soon after his wedding and you say that marriage for him is not really an achievement? 

Dear Motivational friends,let us think objectively and call a spade a spade! Let us not pretend that what is good is bad simply because we don't yet have it.

Marriage is a huge blessing. An institution arranged by God the creator of the universe who knows best! What else do you expect but goodness?

Dear ladies and gentlemen,take your time and be sure it is the person of your heart you are going into marriage with otherwise,continue waiting until you find a very suitable mate.

What is wrong in being single? If you are really happy and comfortable in the state of singleness,if it doesn't bother you that your mates are married and you are still single,if your priority is not marriage,then you don't have to worry. You are missing nothing at all if you are not married because,the source of your happiness does not lie in marriage!

 Sonia Ogbonna,the wife of the popular Nollywood actor says this about marriage:

 

"For some reason,people (mostly females) are brainwashed to think that every relationship that didn't lead to marriage is a"waste of time". Where you rushing to? Let me start with à gently reminder-marriage isn't any form of achievement like some of you might think . You make yourself a Queen,no one will do it for you. Achievement is to be happy. Period''.

For your information,Sonia Ogbonna is still very much in her marriage but she is saying that truly,there is nothing in it! Yes,she was happy and full of life before she got married and nothing so special has been added in her life as a result of marriage that she would not have gotten if she were still single.

Is marriage really an achievement? Yes,only when partners in marriage find reward and fulfillment in their marriage!

But when on the other hand marriage partners are bitter with each other,having regret and sadness in their marriage and wishing they were never in it,then we would say emphatically that marriage is not really an achievement!!! 


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Friday, 20 July 2018

Is It Okay To Marry Someone Younger Than I am?

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Is It Okay To Marry Someone Younger Than I am?

Well I hope you are not expecting me to tell you that this question is coming from women.A lot of people,virtually everywhere in the world accept that men should be older than their wives and when women get attracted to younger men,it becomes something unusual or abnormal. Is it okay to marry someone younger than I am?

If you are wondering if it is okay for a woman to marry someone younger than she is,I also want you to wonder as well if it okay for girls younger than 18 years to start giving birth to children or for women older than 45 years or in their 50's to begin having babies.

You see,there are many things we do not have control of in life. If a child marries before she is 18 years and is in her puberty age what stops her from getting pregnant and having children at that age? And if a woman is married but has not conceived until she is 45 years and above is it by her own making or choice? What is not normal or okay about the things of nature that come their own way and at their own time? Is it okay to marry someone younger than I am?

Read This: Top Things Not To Do If You Are in A Serious Relationship

My dear lady,since when has age become the major factor of successful marriage? All my life,from books and knowledge I have gathered,love and respect are the first major keys that keep marriage happy and successful.

What the creator and initiator of marriage gives as a rule and role for marriage is that husbands should love their wives as their own bodies and wives should have deep respect for their husbands.

If a woman marries a man younger than she is and does not look at him or even treat him as her younger brother but accords him deep respect in all ramifications,there will be no problems at all. The age difference will disappear and will never make any difference to them! Is it okay to marry someone younger than I am?

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And there is something stronger than everyone. Love! Love can shatter and pieces a lion's heart to nothing. Love can also make a weak heart break a rock that a strong hand may not be able to break. That is only when love is in action! Love covers multitude of sins!

Is it okay to marry someone younger than I am? This person is not serious! In fact she is not really in love otherwise,she won't be comparing love to age. If love has come to stay in her heart,if all she thinks and feels now is how to live and build home with her man,she wouldn't be asking if it is okay to marry a man younger than she is.

Please advice her not to. This is because,age is very paramount and very important to her than anything else!

Respecting a man who is younger than you are especially because he loves you as his own body is a gift and it is not everyone that has it! 

My dear, again I say to you:If you cannot respect your man because you are older than he is,if it is impossible you over look your age difference with him,don't accept his proposal. Yes,don't marry him because it is not okay or acceptable by you!

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And you can imagine! He even has the authority and right to propose to you! Can you even do that? You surely do not have the guts or right to do so even as you are older than he is!

Finally to you,age is a number. If you see a man attracted to you and your heart melts for him enough that you can surrender everything to him,it is very much okay to marry him even if he is much younger than you are!!!

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Wednesday, 18 July 2018

Is It Okay To Marry My Brother-in-law?


For a definition,brother-in-law is the brother of one's wife or husband. In this topic,it is wise to say that the person in question here is a woman asking: ''Is it okay to marry my brother-in-law? Dear Motivational reader,what do you have to say?

A woman is married to her husband and now she is asking if it is okay to also marry her brother-in-law,that is the brother to her husband.

My dear woman,is your husband dead or missing?Are you having problem with your husband and you feel you can get out of him by getting married to someone else?

But unfortunately,someone else you admire to marry is not someone else but your husband's blood if that is your reason for getting married to someone else.

Okay,let's say your husband is lost as in missing and not found.And so? Is getting married to his own brother a way of getting your husband back home? The truth is that you do not know the where about of your husband.But he is somewhere,probably very much alive! What happens the day he comes back and discovers that you have given yourself to his own brother in marriage just because he was nowhere to be found?

Are you under the command of your custom and tradition? Yes,some traditions especially in Africa mandate that when one's husband dies,the widow should be automatically married to her brother-in-law otherwise she would lose both her husband's properties and children.

Such traditions are so strong that just one woman cannot fight it! Sometimes,the only solution to this law is leaving the family of her husband entirely without her children and remain unmarried wherever she is for the rest of her life if she refuses to marry her brother-in-law!

Now this woman under this cage is asking: ''Is it okay to marry my brother-in-law? Hello?

What else are you looking in marriage you have not got from your late husband? He has given you home and children and yes,a change of name one of the greatest prides of African women. What else do you want to have in marriage you have not got with the father of your children? And if you leave without taking your children as the tradition demands will your children not still be yours tomorrow and forever? They will surely look for you and come back to you when they are grown.

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Get free from slavery by opposing the option of marrying your brother-in-law. You will only be locked up in chain to be child bearing factory for them. Go,take your leave and realize your potentials as a gifted woman!

Is it okay to marry my brother-in-law? What properties are you afraid of losing if you say no to the tradition that subjects you to getting married to your brother-in-law that you cannot get in double fold if you go make yourself and realize your potentials?

And your brother-in-law you are talking about,is it the one who has a wife already you want to become a second wife to and then struggle to survive under his roof with your children or the one who will soon leave you as an old woman and take a new wife of his choice for himself?

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Dear widow,do give yourself some respect and love. Save yourself further problems,abuse and embarrassment by choosing to get out of that bondage of a house under inconsiderable tradition of womanhood.

What is okay about marrying your brother-in-law who will not even respect you as your husband would, a man who will not even regard or honor your place as a wife?  This is a man who will soon leave you as soon as you accept to be his wife and property in obedience to their tradition and go marry a woman of his dearest choice!

Whether you marry him or not,your husband's properties are in his hands and he will soon hand them all over to his own and dearest wife! Is it okay to marry my brother-in-law? What will you gain in marrying your brother-in-law? What will you lose if you say no to him???

Read more: What Is Bad In Dating A Married Man?
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Tuesday, 17 July 2018

To What Extent Should Man Prove He Loves His Girl?

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To What Extent Should Man Prove He Loves His Girl?

And you know these days,love has gone technology. It has migrated from what used to be analogue to digital. Men are now taking their love style to another level so much that we do not know anymore when it is real love!

A man would see a girl on a street for the first time in his life and claim that he loves her and would like to marry her. On just one spot! What do we call that? Love? 

To prove his claim,he takes her out the next day to where he lives and tells her ''This house is yours from now on''. Without giving this girl any breathing space to think about it all,he would stage a societal birthday party for the girl and kneel down in front of every witness and say '' Baby,will you marry me?'' If you are the girl would you say no?

But well,this is another kind of love affairs we see in society today. There are many crazy ones out there you may know but what we are talking about here is ''To what extend should man prove he loves his girl?

I was listening to one mid night program on radio and it was all about lovers. The presenter would call someone and say that her boyfriend so so and so gave her her number to call her and tell her that he loves her so much and won't trade her for anything on earth. And then the girl would say: ''Oh my God this is great! I love you baby so much and forever I am yours!''

The program went on for hours and I kept following it. Just before it got boring,I discovered that so many boys and men have been sending the numbers of girls they just met few hours or days ago to force out love and compel them to get hooked for the likes of them. How do you explain the situation where the caller calls a lady and says ''your boyfriend Emeka  gave me your number and said I should call you on air and tell you he loves you''. Then the receiver would be like '' Emeka? Who is Emeka?'' You see, Emeka might just be one boy or man that met her few hours or days before and tried to play Mr. Romantic to girl. Being a stuff who knows what she wants,she didn't place him anywhere in her heart to remember him in later time. To what extent should man prove he loves his girl?

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Sometimes I don't just get it! Who should a guy call his girl?  Someone he met recently and said ''I love you?'' The girl who agrees and but said he should give her sometime to think about it? Men,who do you refer to as your girl?

Okay,let's say you have succeeded in getting the heart of that girl who never wanted you in the first place for any reason with your style of spending and showering love. Would you stop spending and telling the whole world you love her so much because you have succeeded in getting her?

If you dare it,you will have started a trouble you will never win. Understand you began in the first place to prove you loved a girl who never wanted you  in an extent you could not continue. That is your trouble and very big problem,and you must settle it yourself!

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Read here: ''Sex On The First Date Doesn't Make You Cheap'-Oyin. Is This True?

Dear men,to what extent should you prove you love your girl? To what extent should man prove he loves his girl? My honest answer: To the extend that you know you can continue to make her happy and continue to keep her in love with you,as long as you live!!! 
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Monday, 16 July 2018

Sex On The First Date Doesn't Make You Cheap. Is This True?

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sex in relationship.

This statement is coming from a Twitter user seeking to be notable among stars who could be talked about anytime,anyhow. Coming up,she has a controversial opinion on s*x saying that sex on the first date does not make you cheap. Is this true?

If s*x on the first date does not make one cheap does not Oyin imply that s*x on a second,third or on  frequent dates make one cheap? Then what difference does it make to have s*x on a first date and avoid it or further dates? What wisdom does Oyin the profounder of this statement give when she says that sex on the first date does not make you cheap?

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Oyin,does a wise saying not have it that first impression matters? If a woman loses herself and opens her legs for a man who wants to see what she has in between her legs on a first date,has it not tell it all what kind of person she is? The man might not have her again on another date if he ever wanted marriage with her in the first place. 

What kind of woman would a man naturally want for marriage? Is it a woman who willingly opens her legs for any man that wants them open? A very loose woman? This is crazy and weird! It is only acceptable in a wayward world.

Someone comes up on a social media platform and all she could give out was promotion of s*x on a first date saying it is like an interview and if one passes it,one would be called to start work. Take a look at her statement below:


''S*x on a first date does not make you cheap. It is called a relationship interview and if you are called back you got the job''. Yes,Oyin is right on an aspect. The kind of date here is relationship interview! Get it right: The date being talked about here is not the one on serious relationship between suitors for marriage. It is a relationship business,seeking for s*x workers.

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But why would the profounder,Oyin associate any proper action or attempt required for getting job to being cheap? What business does a harlot have with looking or being cheap when it comes to s*x? Is it not what she promotes and sales?

Where we are having troubles here with Oyin is on the area where she is mixing dating with s*x work. Oyin,you are making it look like s*x on a first date is good and normal thing and you are encouraging it. Saying that sex on the first day does not make you cheap is asking girls in your generation,people who look up to you for advice on relationship to go ahead and have s*x with their suitors on their first dates. If they do it well to the satisfaction of their suitors and prove they are experts in having s*x,you said they would be called back for work. Which work? S*xing rather than marriage!

Hah! This is unfair Oyin!A woman of virtue doesn't deceive her younger generations. She rather builds them up and sends signals!

To be on a safer side girls,do not open your  legs to any man on your first date. Marriage tie is not founded on s*x performance but on trust.Let your man see moral qualities in you that should make him stick to you.

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Many girls have been deceived by immoral concepts adopted by young ladies such as Oyin but you should stand out! The truth still remains that any man who wants to marry you would hasten up to do so when you harden yourself from having s*x with him until marriage!!!
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